Bad Kitty
by DiaperGirl
Summary: The new Catwoman has big shoes to fill and she's already overestimated her own abilities. This time, though, the consequences won't be escaped so easily. (WARNING: Story contains AB/DL elements.)
1. Chapter 1: A Beginning of Sorts

**Warning:** This story will contain AB/DL content as well an original character or two (one for certain and maybe one more, it depends on how things work out). Nothing will get overly graphic, either violence or sex wise, so that shouldn't be an issue unless you were hoping for that at which point I apologize but it's not my style. Also, the first chapter probably won't feature any of this (seemingly, at least) just yet. It'll all be built to as I go, for at least the first few chapters I have a good idea of where I want to take this. I hope you all enjoy it.

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Well, this is new. Batman wants a favor. To be fair I do owe him one, he kinda pulled me out of a dangerous spot, but who cashes in on a favor that quick?

Let me explain. I like to do a bit of...cat burgling. Most of the goons around here would be fine with some chump change but me? I don't bother. I go for the big stuff. The dangerous stuff. The best part is, I'm actually good enough to go out and get it. Maybe this time, though, I bit off a bit more than I can chew.

I don't typically mess with guys like the Riddler, he's actually a bit more calculated with his plans and has a bit more security, but what's a heist without risk? The reward was too good: a large diamond the size of my fist. Rumors had swirled around Gotham for weeks about Riddler's possession of the diamond. How or why he got it, I wouldn't find out until later, but he had it and I _wanted it._

This is about where I came to owe Batman a favor. Getting to the diamond itself was easy enough, for a guy like the Riddler there wasn't much more than a few simple alarms which probably should have set off a few alarms of my own in my head. It was a bad sign right at the start. But honestly, I just didn't care. I could see the diamond from outside and it was going to be in my hands within minutes. His lack of security was _his_ problem.

As soon as I got the diamond, though, things went south. The building lit up with that neon green and it seemed like every alarm in the place went off. It startled me at first, I won't lie. I checked the diamond and there were no sensors or anything set on it, how it could have set off an alarm is beyond me but soon the entire building was in a lockdown. I was stuck, no way out, and the evidence of my crime was right in my hands.

What's worse is that I knew, just as anybody in this god forsaken city would know, that the Riddler wasn't going to call the cops. He was going to deal with me himself. That's how it works here. I didn't have to wait long for him to show up and if you've ever seen the Riddler you know he's a sight: the green suit with question marks all over it along with that question mark cane he has. The thing that I wasn't expecting was the grin on his face. As he soon explained to me though, he was glad I was there. He set it all up just for me. Not really what I wanted to hear.

It turns out my "secret" alliance with Batman wasn't so secret after all. I'd hoped to cut back on the competition a bit by giving Batman some tips here and there when he needed them, I'm pretty good at getting into places unseen when he can't, but that was really it. When Riddler said the entire trap was set to catch Batman, I started to fear for my life and who wouldn't? What if Batman didn't come? What if this old cat had worn out its welcome? Maybe I should have had a bit more faith in Batman.

Sure enough, just like Riddler had said he would, Batman showed up a while later. Of course the Riddler had to set up some kind of obstacle course for Batman to get through before he could actually get to me, complete with his signature riddles at every step. Oh, did I mention that if he screwed up at all during that course I'd get toasted? Well, there was that too. I was still worried and rightfully so. Riddler told me before he taped my mouth shut that he rigged the last obstacle so not even Batman could get it right. The correct answer would drop him right into a fiery pit, even if he somehow survived the Riddler would have a nice serving of fried kitty to give him as a consolation prize. No thank you.

Luckily, at least for me, Batman got through the course. He even got past the rigged obstacle without even a moment's hesitation. Don't ask me how because I still don't know. At this point I've accepted the fact that trying to figure out how Batman does the things that he does can drive somebody insane. The only thing that really mattered was, regardless of how or why, Batman got me out of there. It was my own fault for getting in that situation in the first place and he was well within his rights to just leave me to my fate. After all, he'd never approved of my more recreational heists. Hell, he'd have probably seen the trap coming from a mile away, he's Batman after all. But even despite all that he came and got me so I owe him.

Even though I owe him, though, I still didn't expect him to come calling me so quickly. I should probably be happy, this means I don't have to run around with that looming over my head for months, but it's the principle of the matter. At least give a girl a month or two to recover from a near death experience before you go calling her in to get herself into another one. To be honest, though, this particular job doesn't really look that hard. All I have to do is get him some of Joker's laughing gas and if there's anything I know about the Joker it's that security isn't his strong suit. Not by a long shot.

Another thing I can say about the Joker is that he really, really gives me the creeps. At least with the other criminals around Gotham you know why they're doing what they're doing. Joker isn't like the other criminals around Gotham though. He commits crimes with no rhyme or reason, sometimes it's like he's just killing for fun. That's the definition of crazy to me. But then again, I don't think anybody was questioning whether or not Joker is crazy. He definitely is, but I've dealt with crazies before too and Joker is on a whole different level. It takes a lot to give me the creeps.

Nevertheless, Catwoman will never be known as a girl who doesn't keep her promises. I told Batman I'd get him that gas and that's exactly what I'm gonna do. I've been scouting this warehouse for over an hour and not a soul has walked in or out, no lights are on inside, and there's no movement from within as far as I can see. Again, Joker isn't known for his strong security. I don't think he really expects anybody to try and steal from him given his reputation.

I figure now is as good of a time as any to make my move. Getting into the building is no problem and the path to the gas that Batman drilled into my head a few hours ago was pretty straightforward. I cracked open one of the crates where Batman told me the gas would be and sure enough there was about 20 metal canisters of what I can only assume was Joker's laughing gas. I slipped my hands in and pulled two of them out, ready to walk out and get this over with. I had just began to walk towards the exit when I heard something from behind me that made my skin crawl.

"Ya'know, it's not nice to steal from Mistah J!"

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**Author's Note:** Let me know in the comments how the point of view felt for you. I'm not used to doing first person but I wanted a chance to make the main character's thoughts felt here which can't really be done in third person. But I only really needed it for this, which was more of a prologue of sorts, so I may go to third person from here on to make things run a bit smoother. If you like the first person I'll play with it and see if it'll work throughout otherwise I'll just stick to what I know and go with third person from here on.


	2. Chapter 2: The Copy Cat

**Author's Note: **Apologies for the delay in getting this second chapter out. Took me a while to get into the writing mood for this one but hopefully everybody enjoys it. I'm trying to slowly build into the main parts of the story here, so there's still not much in terms of AB/DL content but that'll come in the following chapter most likely. Let me know what you think of the perspective change, if people like first person I can go back to that. I realize that seems more comic book-y but it's also more unnatural for me to write so that's something to think about. Regardless, read on and enjoy!

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"Ya'know, it's not nice to steal from Mistah J!"

As if there wasn't already enough to be creeped out about in a warehouse full of Joker's stuff, that voice sent chills up Catwoman's spine. Perhaps it was the tone, not so much angry as it was amused, or perhaps it was the sheer fact that she knows exactly who it is. If there was ever a question of that it can be put to bed: Harley Quinn. She's not exactly the most villainous figure in Gotham but Harley has a trait that makes her more dangerous than your typical goons: love. A strange love, sometimes close to Stockholm Syndrome, but Harley would do anything for her 'Mistah J'. That makes Catwoman's current predicament all the more worrisome with the evidence of her crime still gripped in her hands.

With a quick survey of the room Catwoman finds no clear indication of where Harley actually is. As the silence sets in Catwoman continues to search around, until another sound is heard.

"C'mon Kitty Cat! You didn't think I was gonna let'cha get away that easy didja? Mistah J needs that gas to keep Gotham smiling!"

This time Catwoman knows where the voice came from. She instantly looks to try and find it, walking in the direction it came from. Peering around the large crates and assorted funhouse items you'd expect to see in a warehouse used by the Joker of all people, Catwoman isn't having much luck in her search. That is, until she manages to catch a glimpse of Harley's red boot just near the edge of one of the crates. Catwoman slowly sneaks up to it, being careful not to make any noises, before eventually lunging around the crate and grabbing Harley by the arms! She's quick to shove her forearm against Harley's throat, pushing her back against the crate in an effort to knock her out when...

"I gotcha now, Kitty Cat!"

That confuses our heroine as she very clearly hears the voice coming from right in front of her...which is impossible given that her forearm is pressing into Harley's throat. That's when she realizes her mistake: it's not Harley at all. Too caught up in the heat of the moment, Catwoman failed to realize that what she actually had her hands on was a mere dummy. As she tries to react to this, she's suddenly pounced on from the side by the real Harley Quinn. Harley lands on top of her, pinning her down on the floor of the warehouse and suddenly shoving a knife right against her throat.

"Oh oh** oh** Mistah J is gonna be_ sooo_ happy, I caught a mean ol' Kitty Cat tryin' ta' make off with his laughing gas!" As Catwoman looked up at this deranged woman, the black diamonds painted around her eyes and the colorful blonde hair pulled into pigtails, she couldn't help but be somewhat terrified by the sickening grin that shined through all of those other traits. It was unnerving to see this woman grinning so widely, with her red lipstick making it seem even wider. "I bet'cha Bats ain't comin' to save ya' this time Kitty Cat. Nope! It's just you n' me and maybe, if you're lucky, I'll take ya' to see Mistah J." Harley presses the knife harder against Catwoman's throat, her grin growing wider as she notices Catwoman's struggling. "_Aww_, don't be scared! Mistah J won't hurt'cha. You're more useful than that, lotsa people are out lookin' for _Selena Kyle!_" That wasn't what Catwoman wanted to hear. This was gonna get ugly fast. She started to struggle a bit harder, simply causing Harley to press the knife even harder against her throat. "C'mon, you're not surprised are ya'? Let's just say you could take a few more tips from ol' Bats on how to keep your identity a secret. Reminds me, though, not gonna get many chances to do this am I?" With that, Harley reached around with her other hand and grabbed Catwoman's mask. Despite her constant struggling, she can't stop it and soon she's unmasked.

"Now wait'a minute. You're not Catwoman!"

You could say the cat's out of the bag, but, that's just too easy. As the woman's blonde hair falls against the floor, now free from its trapped position in her mask, Harley could tell immediately that this isn't the real Catwoman. _"Catwoman has black hair, duh!" _Harley thought, more annoyed now than she had been before. She presses her knife back against this woman's throat as hard as she could without actually cutting into the skin, speaking up in a very agitated tone. "So you're a copy cat, huh? Where's Catwoman and how come Bats is sendin' you in her place?"

A sigh escapes our heroine as she realizes the trouble she's in. As Harley eases the knife back a little so she can speak, she speaks up very hesitantly to maybe explain some of this. Although she knows no amount of explaining will save her here.

"I-I am Catwoman. Selena is...well...retired. I took her place so I could get a few of her connections." As crazy as it sounds, it could be true. Nobody had truly seen Selena Kyle in quite some time, perhaps she'd quietly let somebody else take over for her after amassing enough money to live comfortably somewhere in Gotham. There are a few problems with this story but for now that's all the woman seems to have to offer Harley.

Harley isn't exactly pleased by it either. She may be a bit naive but she's not dumb and she knows a lie when she hears it. She presses the knife back against the woman's throat. "I'm not buyin' it honey. Why would Catwoman just let somebody take her identity like that?" A fair question, this could easily backfire and leave Selena exposed for attack by any of her numerous enemies should this "new" Catwoman be caught much like she is now, but the woman has an answer. "I'm her...friend..." A sigh from Harley doesn't necessarily bode well for this 'friend' as she soon speaks up again. "Oh yeah, then what's your name, sweetheart? Maybe Mistah J can use ya' to get to the real Catwoman...or maybe even ol' Bats." More struggling from the woman as she tries to break free of Harley's grasp, but nothing she does can get Harley off of her. She finally relents, sighing as she responds, "Christina. Christina Taylor." This answer causes Harley to chuckle as she pulls the knife back off Christina's throat. "Mind if I call ya' Christy?" This one takes Christina off guard, a rather tame question after the hostile reactions to her past few answers. She gulps and offers a weak nod, allowing Harley to continue. "Good! But, Christy, I gotta tell ya'...I'm still not buyin' your story and Mistah J won't be happy if I bring him back a copy cat! _Sooooo!_" Harley raises the knife up into the air...

This is it. Christina closes her eyes tightly, terrified and helpless to escape what seems imminent. But just as Harley seems ready to bring the knife down she's stopped by a slight hissing sound. She looks around, confused, until she looks down and notices something beneath her. She follows this up with a wrinkle of her nose, realizing exactly what just happened. She reacts to this in a way that only somebody connected with the Joker could by letting out a chilling laugh, looking back down at Christina with a wide grin. "Scared, sweetie? I guess this little copy cat ain't even house trained! Ya'know what? I think I will bring ya' back to Mistah J. He could use a good smile today!" Utterly humiliated and still very much terrified of the situation, Christina's eyes begin to open now, just in time to see Harley's knife flying down towards her grip first. The butt of the knife connects right on Christina's jaw, knocking her out cold. Harley can't help but chuckle as she promptly stands up off the defeated "Catwoman", looking at the small puddle around the girl and wrinkling her nose once again. "Oh Mistah J is just gonna _diiiie_ when he hears about this one!"


End file.
